


Self-Portrait with a Red Star

by EHyde



Series: artist!Shin-ah [2]
Category: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Genre: Drabble, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-26 15:52:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3856360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EHyde/pseuds/EHyde
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Late at night, when everyone else is asleep, Shin-Ah paints. At least, he thinks the others are asleep (semi-sequel to "A Thousand Words")</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self-Portrait with a Red Star

The sun sets, its hot light replaced by soft moonlight, cool starlight, and those other, colored lights that look like stars to everyone else ( _planets_ , Yoon says they’re called). The others are going to sleep but Shin-Ah wanders until he finds a small clearing overlooking a densely-forested valley. He sits against a tree, his back to the camp, and lifts off his mask. Tonight he is going to make a picture.

When Shin-Ah made his first painting, he hadn’t intended to make more. The paper and ink were for learning to write, after all. But Yoon had liked that first picture, and when he showed it to the rest of the group, they had liked it too. And Shin-Ah had found the process of painting to be … “relaxing” wasn’t the right word.

Without the mask fencing in his vision, it’s easy to get lost, because there’s so _much_ , because everything is so clear, and it’s not overwhelming so much as it’s over- _interesting_. Even without people to — _to look at, just to look at_ — there are so many thing to see; there’s nothing to stop his eyes from racing across the entire world, or from stopping to peer closer, closer, closer at a single leaf or flower. So the first time, when he first began to paint, his mask was still on. But to make a picture of what he sees, when he can’t see clearly … it feels wrong. And so he had lifted up his mask, with a brush in his hand and paper before him, and … painting is like an anchor. He can look at the world, see it the way he _needs_ to see it, and as long as he keeps the brush moving across the paper, he doesn’t lose track of himself. So no, “relaxing” isn’t the right word, but it’s calm — an intense, focused calmness.

Tonight, he’s so focused that he doesn’t notice the sound of footsteps approaching until Yona steps into his field of vision. _Yona’s here. I should stop._ But his brush is already tracing out the rough flow of her skirt, the sharp line of the first arrow she fires, and he doesn’t stop. _Yona is so beautiful._ The light of the moon glides across her hair, and the light of the red planet sets it on fire, but Shin-Ah only has black ink. _She knows this focus, too, right?_ Shin-Ah thinks as he watches her make the same practiced movements over and over again. _This intensity?_ His eyes trace the angle of her arm as it pulls back the bowstring, so much more steady and precise than the first time he saw her shoot. Then she shudders and her arrow flies wild. _No! I didn’t —_

_Ink. Brush. Paper._ That’s it. He keeps painting, and Yona is fine. The rest of her arrows fly true. Finally she steps further out into the clearing to retrieve the arrows. “…Shin-Ah?” she says, noticing him at last as she turns back. Quickly, he replaces his mask. “Were you there the whole time?” _Without your mask,_ she doesn’t say. Wordlessly, he shows her the picture. “Oh! You captured me perfectly, didn’t you?”

“I … I didn’t …” _I didn’t capture you. I could have. I wanted to. I looked at you so closely, and … I didn’t._

Slowly, Yona nods. “You did, though.” She points to the painting. “Your eyes did this. They held me close and they carried me safely here.” Shin-Ah tries to press the picture into her hands but she pushes it away. “Keep it,” she says. “I want you to keep it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'm [fallenwithstyle](http://fallenwithstyle.tumblr.com) on tumblr if you want to come say hi.


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